Have you ever witnessed or experienced dealing with a pervert in a public space? As women, spending time in public spaces has required a different kind of survival skill lately. Danger is lurking everywhere, but what an average woman has to deal with is statistically mind-boggling. There are figures to prove it. Meanwhile, girls just want to have fun.
We all can’t be introverts. Even introverts have to step out every now and then. Being at the bus stop, being on the bus, or waiting in line at the supermarket can go from a simple scenario to the possibility of sexual harassment. The sad part is almost every woman, irrespective of age, has to deal with this at a point.
Imagine dealing with a pervert in a bus. You know how the atmosphere of public transport, mostly a bus, can be. It’s awfully quiet, with everyone minding their business. They are usually engrossed in their phones, ignoring what is unfolding around them. In the midst of that silence, there is a pervert in a corner with a creepy thought, hoping he is invisible.
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Dealing With A Pervert
Dealing with a pervert in public is not just awkward but destabilizing as well. It messes with your sense of safety in places where you are supposed to feel assured. No one really prepares to be touched or witness someone touching themselves inappropriately in public. One minute you are going about your day; the next minute someone has decided to create an uncomfortable experience. If you spend a lot of time online, you have probably seen different stories of ladies sharing their traumatic experiences dealing with a pervert.
Perverts thrive on invisibility and doubt. They rely on the assumption that you will second-guess yourself or stay quiet to avoid embarrassment. Since it has become unavoidable and you cannot dictate how other people act in public, here are ways to prepare yourself for unforeseen circumstances when dealing with a pervert.
Don’t Be Afraid to Call Them Out
Be stern and loud when speaking to perverts. If you are being touched inappropriately, make sure you are loud and clear when saying, “What is wrong with you?” “Or stop touching me inappropriately.” Give them a cold stare while at it. Do not be intimidated or silenced by embarrassment. You are not guilty of anything. This way your voice will alert bystanders and crush the confidence of the perpetrator.
Cause a Scene if Possible
Don’t hold back; remember you are the victim here. Embarrass the person by saying what wrong they are doing to you. This makes them withdraw immediately and even rethink their next action. In the case where the pervert wants to deny or flip the script, be ready to face them head on, clearly talking about what they did. Imagine someone groping you in a bus as you stand with other passengers; when you call them out, they can easily deny it or use the movement of the bus as an excuse. Make sure you tell them to steer clear of you or be ready to face the wrath and watch what will happen.
Find Safety
Not everyone has the confidence to face their offenders or create a scene to defend themselves, especially when it involves a man. So, it’s fine to find alternative means of handling the situation; your safety is what matters most. When you witness someone being weird or trying to harass you, move toward a crowded area or find security personnel. Resist the urge to be polite. You are trying to avoid a situation that can possibly scar you, leaving you with the emotional aftermath.
Be Ready for Self-defense
Not all of us have martial arts training, but we must be prepared. Be ready to use your elbows, safety pins to poke, or pepper spray when dealing with a pervert.
Here are a few ways to handle different scenarios:
- In public transport, move to another seat and be far from the pervert. Speak to the driver or any other staff on board, and the issue should be addressed.
- If it is a stalker, do go towards your house or final location. Head to a well-lit, crowded place or the police station.
- Indecent exposure or touching should be reported to the police or necessary authorities around it.
- Photo or video evidence is necessary. Record harassment or perverted behavior to have evidence.
Read Also: What Legally Counts as Rape in Nigeria?
Preventive/Protective Measures You Can Take
Dealing with a pervert isn’t about being fearless and having the perfect vim to be dramatic. It’s about thinking of your discomfort and your safety.
So, you must be aware of your environment at all times. Drop the habit of being engrossed with your phone in public if you are used to it. Also, it’s imperative that you trust your instinct. If someone or a place makes you feel uncomfortable, excuse yourself from them immediately. As a lady, carry protective gear like pepper spray or a taser if it is legal in your country. Even your ring can be a self-defense tool.
Do not hesitate to report cases of sexual harassment or contact security personnel if you feel threatened. Do not be silent when dealing with a pervert.
